Warning: You may think this post contains too much information and it probably does.

My husband got a disturbing phone call last night. His 72 year old mother called to tell him about her attempted sexual trist with his 74 year old father. Apparently, this was their first go at it in many years. I'll spare you the details because I'm having trouble getting the image out of my head as it is. Let's just say they got more creative than I ever would have expected from them.

What they were shooting for isn't that uncommon. The New York Times reported on a Swedish study that shows many more seniors in their 70's are having sex today than ever before. The study wasn't clear on why this was the case but there is speculation that these seniors are healthier and perhaps more sexually revolutionized, having been in their 30's during the sexual revolution of the 1960's. I'm pretty sure the development of drugs for erectile dysfunction have something to do with it too.

What was interesting to me was the disparity between how many men vs women reported having sex. Among the married crowd, 68% of men reported having sex with only 56% of women admitting to it. That made me wonder if they were surveying couples. We're these men over 70 married to younger women? Were they having sex with someone other than their wife? Were the woman too shy to admit they were getting it on? Did the men exaggerate and report something that wasn't happening at all? Hmmmmm.

Among the unmarried seniors, 54% of men reported having sex while only 12% of women reported it. What's wrong here? Are these men choosing younger women who weren't included in the study? For some reason I have a mental picture of a retirement community with a bunch of frisky men and only a handful of frisky women. I'm thinking for so many of these frisky men to be getting it on with so few of the women, the women must be playing the field a bit.

Okay, I'm being a little ridiculous and letting my imagination run wild. Let me just say that the study left much to the imagination.

In all honesty, I was very excited to read these statistics. A healthy sex life can really improve quality of life. The physical, emotional, and social benefits of sex are numerous. It can be difficult to focus on sex when you're also focusing on a serious illness but it's still important.

If you are having difficulty with sex, talk with your doctor or palliative care nurse. We understand the importance of a healthy sex life and want to help you achieve it.

Cory Silverberg, About.com's guide to Sexuality has written a good piece "Myths about Sexuality and Disability" dispelling the myth that people with illnesses aren't sexual beings. Thanks for clearing that up Cory!

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_{Photo © Marc Maloy/Getty Images}

[p]Trisha Torrey, About.com's guide to Patient Empowerment, wrote a blog titled "Doctors, Passive Aggressiveness, and Being a Fly on the Wall" about a Readers Digest article 41 Secrets Your Doctor Would Never Share. Her blog made me curious to find out what other secrets your doctor doesn't want you to know. Some of these secrets should make anyone with a serious or life-limiting illness very nervous.

For example, an anonymous oncologist in Santa Cruz, CA reveals:

"I used to have my secretary page me after I had spent five minutes in the room with a difficult or overly chatty patient. Then I'd run out, saying, "Oh, I have an emergency."

Because they are seeing an oncologist, these "overly chatty patients" obviously have, or have had in the past, cancer. Seems to me that a patient with cancer deserves more than a quick five minute conversation with the doctor they're trusting to treat it. It also makes me wonder just what he found "difficult" about these patients. Maybe they were demanding to know vital information about their illness and treatment options that they just couldn't get in five minutes. In any case, if you have cancer and live in Santa Cruz, be wary of the oncologist with "an emergency".

There was a bit of good news in that article, though. An anonymous pediatrician in Chicago reveals:

"Though we don't cry in front of you, we sometimes do cry about your situation at home."

Thanks doctor. It's good to know you care.

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_{Photo used with permission from Reader's Digest}